Rating: 3 out of 5 Stars
Genre: Self Help (Love & Romance)
Publication Year: 2009
Synopsis (From Google Books):
Since she exploded on the scene with her two juicy and impossible-to-put-down tell-alls, readers have wanted to know even more about what makes Karrine Steffans tick. How was she able to meet all the high profile politicians, movie stars, and other celebrities that are her close acquaintances? What skills does she possess to keep men wanting more? Finally, Karrine lays it all out and explains exactly what a woman must do to win over the man of her dreams. With chapters like "Never Let Him See You Sweat,""Flirting,""Encouraging His Manhood," and "Give Him What He Wants," this hot and sexy manual is a must-have for every woman's bookshelf
Literally speaking the The Vixen Manual comes as a surprise. As someone who had try to read Steffans' first work Confessions of A Video Vixen, the expectations of her writing ability were pretty low. There are varying opinions on whether or not Steffans uses a ghost writer. It is reported that she does but she claims that she writes all her books herself. If she is to be believed there is a remarkable jump in her writing ability from the first book to her third book (The Vixen Manual). The writing in The Vixen Manual is superb, in fact, better than some people with English degrees (my roommates opinion). It's hard to believe that she wrote this book (am I just hating?). While, the writing was good, after about the first half of the books it is annoying. Steffans writing seems to take on this tone that becomes unpleasant and patornizing. The impressive writing starts to wear off. To top that off she has a tendency to repeat herself. There is very little difference in the chapters, they basically all have the same point. It became hard to want to complete the book because it became very predictable.
I can't say that the book lives up to the title, it doesn't tell you how to find, seduce and keep the man you want. Mainly Steffans repeats the same on message over and over again; respect and love yourself. That is it. There are no exciting new sex tips (she does advice women to be more sexually adventurous). There is no advice on where to find the sort of man that you are looking for. In fact, the information isn't that different from anything that can't be found in online article or Cosmo. At times the information seemed like common sense. Steffans does encourge women to work on themselves and achieve their goals. While some of the messages she delievers are okay, there were a few that seemed sort of off. In what she calls "The New Dating Game", she advices women to date more than one man at a time, to rank them and tell them where they stand. That is sort of degrading. What woman worth her grain of salt would stay with a man that told her she was number 3 out of 5 on his list of females. There isn't anything wrong with dating one than one person at a time (if there is no sex involoved). There is nothing wrong with ranking people that you are dating, as long as you don't tell them. That is disrespectful. She contradicts herself by saying that it is okay to sleep with more than one person at a time (but remember to be safe) and then stating that beware of your behavoir so you don't come off as a slut. Doesn't these two things sort of contradict themselves. Another issue is that she plays into the Superwoman sterotype. In her message there is the feeling that a woman should be all things to her man and that if she doesn't an he leaves than it is her fault. A woman should be able to work, cook, clean, raise children, and look hot at all times. This is unrealistic and potentially exhuasting course. Not anywhere in her book does it say anyting about forming a partnership and finding out a way to split the responisblitiy to the house, kids, and careers together. The woman sort of becomes the work horse and the man has to be feel and be treated like king all the time.
If you are reading this book to get the freaky sex tips this is not the book. There are about a total of two diagrams showing different sexual positions. But that is all.
It is a interesting read at first, but quickly losses it appeal.
Pros: Writing, Advice
Cons: Repetitive, Advice
I am not normally a "Self Help" book reader. While I do like some of what Steffans some of it gets the side eye. There are better relationship books out there but it is not a bad start.
As a sidenote my roommate started to read this book and abandoned it. In the first five chapters is claimed she could have written it herself. Also, she is spectual on whether Steffans wrote the book herself. But we both are trying not to be judgment or "hate ".